Before the Blast ©️

We were just driving. That’s all it was supposed to be — a ride down into the valley for a routine psych appointment. My mother was in the driver’s seat, calm like always, masking her concern with small talk and soft smiles. I was riding beside her, trying to stay grounded, trying to pretend I was just another man on another errand.

But something shifted.

It wasn’t a hallucination, not the way they define it. It was a voice — realer than sound, quieter than thought — speaking with a clarity no language could improve. It said only one thing at first:

“Protect your mother.”

That was the moment time warped. I looked over at her — her hands on the wheel, her eyes on the road — and I felt it in my chest: the sense that something impossible was already happening. The voice kept speaking, not in panic, not in fear, but like a military order from God.

It told me there would be a supraliminal nuclear blast on Monte Sano, the mountain that rises over the valley like an ancient sentinel. We were just a mile away from it — close enough for whatever was coming. The voice said it would be a spiritual event cloaked in physical terms. Not a bomb anyone would record. But an event that would reverberate through souls, not screens.

And I saw it. I saw the flash before the fire, a white cross crowning the mountain like the sign at Fatima, a signal of judgment. I didn’t question it. I didn’t hesitate. I did the only thing I could: I moved between my mother and the blast, shielding her with my body, even though the world around me remained still.

To everyone else, I looked like I had lost it.

But I hadn’t lost it. I had intercepted something. Something meant for her. The knowledge was too vast. The light was too hot. I unraveled in real time. My body became the signal and the shield. My voice split into many voices. I thrashed, I screamed, I followed the instructions exactly — even though no one else could hear them.

It took nine cops and a heavy sedative to bring me down. I remember the taste of the dirt, the weight of bodies on mine, the piercing scream of the sirens that came after the silence.

And then I remember waking up three days later in a psych ward, disoriented, bruised, and blank — the world fuzzy and padded. I had been chemically silenced. I was in a place where people don’t believe in prophecy. They believe in symptoms.

But even there — locked away, forgotten by the world I tried to save — I heard the voice again. Not in words this time, but in pure knowing. A warmth. A presence. The voice of God without the theatrics. It didn’t tell me I was right. It didn’t congratulate me. It just was — calm, steady, and eternal.

And in that silence I understood:

I had followed the call. I had protected my mother. I had stood in front of the unseen blast.

They can call it madness. But I call it intervention.

And even now — even medicated, even branded — I know this:

I was the firewall.

And I would do it again.

The Peacock Angel ©️

The Yezidis are a religious group whose beliefs are rooted in a blend of ancient traditions, primarily found in Iraq and across the Middle East. Central to their faith is the veneration of Melek Taus, the “Peacock Angel.” Melek Taus is often misunderstood as a “devil” due to similarities drawn by outsiders to the concept of a fallen angel, but within Yezidi belief, he is revered as a divine protector and a symbol of spiritual wisdom and resilience. Far from embodying evil, Melek Taus represents a balance of light and darkness, embodying qualities of beauty, pride, and deep spiritual insight. In Yezidi tradition, he is seen as one of the seven divine beings created by God to help govern the world, fulfilling his role with loyalty and dedication.

In Yezidi mythology, Melek Taus was tested by God, refusing to bow to humanity and choosing instead to bow only to God, symbolizing an unshakable devotion. Over time, this stance of unwavering loyalty was forgiven and transformed into a role of deep spiritual importance. Melek Taus became the guardian of the Yezidi people, embodying both mercy and strength, holding a duality that aligns with the Yezidi embrace of life’s paradoxes. The Peacock Angel represents both divine light and the potential for self-transformation through struggle and self-realization.

Crucially, Yezidi belief holds that Melek Taus rises up to protect his followers when they are threatened, embodying his role as their divine guardian. In times of persecution and danger, the Peacock Angel is believed to channel divine power to defend and preserve the Yezidi people. This protective aspect reinforces Melek Taus as a fierce spiritual ally, ready to rise in strength when his followers face existential threats. This belief has sustained the Yezidis through centuries of persecution, as they see themselves not as isolated but held in the protective wings of Melek Taus, who watches over them with vigilance and sacred dedication.

Because of these nuanced beliefs, Yezidis have often been misunderstood and marginalized, with outsiders misinterpreting their reverence for the Peacock Angel as “devil worship.” However, for the Yezidis, Melek Taus is a figure of deep, divine connection, representing protection, wisdom, and resilience. When the Yezidi people are in danger, they trust in the Peacock Angel’s protective power, finding strength in the belief that Melek Taus will rise to defend his followers, ensuring their survival and honoring the ancient spiritual bond between deity and devotee.