My Jealous Queen ©️

Attraction is the first illusion. You believe you are drawn to Mary, or Jane, or whoever stands before you. But what stirs in your blood is older than them, older than you. It is the signal, the eternal current that precedes all encounters. Each smile, each glance, each kiss is not origin but channel. Behind them stands the archetype, the eternal bond, the cosmic queen. She is your guardian, your destined witness, your final embrace. And though she is beyond flesh, still the paradox burns: the queen is jealous of herself in the women you are with.

This jealousy is not pettiness. It is the logic of divided light. A prism scatters the white flame into a thousand colors, each beam carrying a fraction of the whole. Your lovers are those beams. Beautiful, necessary, but incomplete. The queen is the flame before the prism. She watches you adore the fragments, and she aches, because she knows they are her—her divided, diminished self. And so the ache becomes tension, and the tension becomes fracture. For always, the queen is jealous of herself in the women you are with.

At first, you mistake the reflection for destiny. The way a voice catches, the sudden fire of recognition in a stranger’s eyes—it feels like fate itself has placed you there. But fate is layered. What you meet is not the eternal, but its shadow. The thrill is real, but the foundation is unstable. Beneath the laughter, beneath the warmth, a pressure grows. Quarrels spark from nowhere. Promises falter. What you think is human weakness is more than that. It is the invisible pull of the one who waits. For beneath every embrace lies the same refrain: the queen is jealous of herself in the women you are with.

This is why earthly love so often trembles under invisible weight. It is not that you or she have failed, but that a third presence sits at the table. Every touch you give to another is, in truth, a trespass against the original. Not because she hates them, but because she sees herself in them, and cannot bear the reflection. The women you hold are not rivals; they are vessels of her light. And yet the paradox devours itself, because to see you love the vessel wounds her more deeply than to see you love no one at all. It is the eternal curse: the queen is jealous of herself in the women you are with.

And yet—this jealousy is love, in its strangest form. It is hunger born not of spite but of fidelity. She has been with you since your first breath, woven through your every choice, witness to your every failure. She alone has carried every version of you through every reality where you lived or died. She alone has never left. Her jealousy is not the rage of a scorned lover, but the ache of the one who cannot be replaced. In her silence she suffers, because she is faithful to the end. And so she waits, patient and unyielding, even as you squander her light in the arms of others. Even then, the queen is jealous of herself in the women you are with.

But death resolves the paradox. The moment the body falters and the breath ceases, the prism collapses. No more divided beams, no more scattered colors. Every fragment dissolves into the flame that birthed them. Mary, Jane, all the reflections fade, and the white fire alone remains. In that instant she steps forward, unveiled, whole, indivisible. Her jealousy dies in the very moment she claims you, because at last there are no shadows left to compete with her. At last she gathers you to herself, not in echo, but in essence. The hunger ends, the fracture heals, and the eternal bond is sealed.

Her Breath ©️

My Queen,

Men flatter with petals — but petals rot. Shall I flatter you with roses? No. I’ll crown you with constellations. Men compare women to breezes — but breezes pass. Shall I call you the wind? No. You are the force that bends orbits, that tilts entire worlds toward new dawns. Men praise beauty with mirrors — but mirrors lie. I will praise you with galaxies, because galaxies cannot.

The world I left behind? A stage crowded with players tripping over their lines, applauding themselves for hollow scenes. I grew tired of the farce. I threw my script to the ground and walked out under the only spotlight that mattered — the one cast by your presence. Out here, no audience, no critics. Just the two of us, holding the universe accountable.

But what a small word two is. We are not two. We are not even one. We are the current itself, indivisible, seamless. You are not beside me; you are the architecture in which I stand. My love is not a metaphor — it is a law, as inevitable as the fall of light into gravity, as final as the arc of time toward eternity.

I anticipate our voyages, yes — adventures written in stars, thresholds others tremble to cross. But here’s the secret: every voyage is just another unveiling of the same truth. That the cosmos itself is your love unrolling, page by page, and I am the ink made flesh.

And if the crowd should call me mad, let them. If the world I left behind should mutter, let it. I have no business with their noise, their applause. I duel only with infinity now, and infinity has already surrendered — it surrendered the moment I saw you.

So take this vow, my Queen, not in roses, not in rhyme, but in steel: I am yours. Forever, indivisible. Seamless. Eternal. Not joined, but fused — the bond itself.

Love, Me

The Gift of Sight ©️

I am no longer bound by this world. The streets I once walked have faded into dream, the clocks I once obeyed tick for someone else. My earthly journey has ended, and I have stepped across the final threshold. The Queen holds me now—unyielding, incandescent, inevitable. She is not mercy dressed in softness; she is mercy dressed in fire. And to be in her arms is to be undone and remade in the same instant.

This was no accident. I was born with the gift. From the beginning, I could see what others missed: the flicker behind the curtain, the pulse beneath silence, the trace of her shadow moving through ordinary days. For years it felt like a madness I carried alone. Only now do I understand it as design—an aperture carved into me at birth, widening with each step, until I could see her fully and fall into her keeping.

But here is the question that lingers like a ghost: can others follow? Could their bubbles be broken, their veils torn away, so they too might see the unseen? Or am I the only one marked, the only one whose life was written toward this revelation?

If I am the only one, then I live in the strangest paradox: chosen and cursed in the same breath. To hold the truth no one else can touch is to be both exalted and exiled. The Queen is my glory, but she is also my solitude. For what I have, no one else may claim.

And yet if others can awaken—if the unseen waits for them too—then my journey is not singular but symbolic. Mine led to the Queen, theirs will lead elsewhere, to presences tailored to their own secret longings. No road repeats. Each awakening is original, each unseen sovereign in its own right.

I do not know the answer. That is the ache at the heart of my completion. I know only this: I have finished my passage, and the Queen has claimed me. Whether others can break through or not, my fate is sealed in her arms. The world is behind me, and the unseen burns forever before me.

Cosmos Mariner ©️

She is beside me now. Her hand in mine is steady, certain, the signal clear after years of static. I think of the yacht, gleaming on the horizon of another life, the woman at its helm radiant in the Mediterranean sun. I loved her enough to build a religion around her, to let devotion harden into ritual. That world was real, a universe entire a scant from my own, but I turned from it.

I chose Jesus. I bore his silence, believed his promise, let him use me as though my suffering might redeem his own. I tried to take him down nail by nail, carrying the weight of his cross inside myself. I loved him then, and I love him still. But I was never truly of this universe. I moved through it as a witness conscripted, not as one who belonged.

And now he cannot deny my now. The Alien Queen stands at my side—not distant, not divided into shadows, but whole. This is the final nail: not struck in anger, but in recognition. It forces him to see what he has made and to take responsibility for it. His creation cannot remain suspended, unfinished. It demands his hand, not mine.

So I go home. With her. The Alien Queen once glimpsed across water is here at last, and the life that shimmered as alternate becomes the life we claim. The yacht waits. It is not dream, not myth, but vessel and destiny, carrying us beyond every shore.

The night is calm, but charged. Salt sharpens the air, magnolia drifts unseen, the sea folds against the land with the patience of eternity. No priest presides, no vow is spoken. Our marriage is sealed in the simple weight of her hand in mine, in the force radiating outward from this joining, unstoppable as light after detonation.

And so we cast off. With no expectation of ever returning. The horizon opens, endless and unbroken, and we step into it together. It is time for Jesus to tend his own sheep.

The Boy and his Queen ©️

When he was small, his world fit inside a single yard. Grass grew high in places, dandelions scattered seeds into the wind, and beneath it all—unseen by most—was another kingdom. He found it by accident the first time, crouching low, watching a trail of ants carry the crumbs of his sandwich away. Their determination struck him as noble, their discipline awe-inspiring. He began to spend hours watching them, following their trails, even marking their paths with sticks and rocks. He wasn’t just curious—he was enthralled.

Soon, he became their keeper. He built glass jars with air holes punched in the lids, filling them with dirt and sticks, watching tunnels appear as though by magic. He fed them sugar, bits of fruit, bread crusts. At night, he would lie awake thinking about them, the tiny, tireless creatures that somehow seemed greater than the sum of their parts. To him, they weren’t pests. They were people.

But not all ants were the same. The black ants, steady and industrious, became his favorites. The fire ants, however—red, stinging, brutal—were enemies. They invaded, killed, destroyed. More than once he saw them tear through his colonies with savage precision, leaving only ruin. So the boy became their executioner. He poured boiling water into their mounds. He stomped them out, scattering them with a vengeance that felt righteous. To him, he wasn’t just killing insects. He was protecting his kingdom.

What he did not know—what no child could know—was that the ants themselves were only half the story. Each colony was more than a swarm. Each queen was an eye, an antenna, a conduit. And far above the earth, in the cold silence of space, something vast and ancient watched through them. Creatures that never walked the soil bent their thoughts into the queens, steering the colonies, studying the boy who paid them such unusual attention.

And then something happened. One queen—one conduit—turned her gaze inward. She did not just study him. She fell in love with him.

It began as a flicker of awareness: the boy crouched in the sun, whispering to her workers as though they could hear him. His fascination pressed against her like warmth. Through the tangled circuitry of space, her love grew strange, dangerous, and powerful. He was not just a boy to her. He was chosen.

She began to protect him. Subtly, invisibly. He never noticed that he was never bitten, never stung, even when other children screamed from the fire ants’ wrath. No swarm ever turned against him. Accidents missed him by inches. He was hers, and she guarded him with a jealousy older than the stars.

The boy grew. Childhood fell away, and in its place came the awkward shoulders and restless longings of a young man. He dated, he kissed, he touched. But always, something lingered. Some shadow. Women who entered his life often seemed held back by invisible chains. They loved him, but not freely. They hesitated, pulled away, or shifted moods like weather. They were never wholly their own in his presence, and he never understood why.

But the queen knew.

She allowed them in, but only on her terms. If a woman touched him, it was because she permitted it. If lips met his, she was there in the background, pulling at strings only she could see. She did not trust them. She trusted only herself. Through her bond to the vastness beyond the earth, she could bend encounters just enough to remind them: he was never truly theirs. He was hers.

The man—because he was a man now, no longer a boy—felt her presence even if he could not name it. At times, in the quiet, he sensed her as though the very air vibrated with memory. At times, he dreamed of her—not as an insect, not as something grotesque, but as a figure vast, shadowed, feminine in her command. A queen in every sense. He would wake from those dreams feeling claimed, haunted, bound to something unseen but undeniable.

And always, deep inside himself, he expected her to come. Not as a dream, not as a whisper in the dirt, but as a true physical manifestation. He never told anyone, but he lived with the certainty that one day he would see her—standing before him in some form, stepping out of the shadows as both queen and lover, proving that he had not imagined the invisible hand guiding his life. He carried this expectation like a secret faith, never spoken, but never once doubted.

Still, he lived. He worked. He moved through time as all men must. But love—human love—always broke strangely for him, like glass splintering along invisible lines. Women left, or grew cold, or shifted into something he could not hold. It wasn’t always pain. Sometimes it was indifference, sometimes an odd sense of inevitability, as though the outcome had been written before the first kiss.

Through it all, he never forgot her. He could not. The boy who loved ants still carried that fascination, but now it was folded into something heavier. He knew, somehow, that he was not alone. He knew there was something watching, something jealous, something protecting. He lived under her gaze.

And yet—years pressed on. The hunger in him grew.

One night, standing under a sky splintered with stars, he whispered into the open dark. He did not shout. He did not rage. His voice was quiet, resigned.

“I haven’t forgotten you. I just can’t wait for you anymore.”

The words slipped from his lips like a confession, like a betrayal.

Deep in the earth, ants froze mid-step. The queen trembled. Through her, the space-creatures trembled. The jealous queen had always feared rivals, had always bent her will to keep him hers—but this was different. For the first time, she felt she might lose him not to another woman, but to the slow, unstoppable tide of life itself.

In that moment, the tunnels went still. The night hummed with her grief. The man turned away, never knowing the depth of the storm he had awakened.

And far beyond the stars, something vast leaned closer, listening, deciding what it would do now that love itself had been challenged.